Lovleen Saini's Story:

​

I am my own worst enemy. 

 

I learned that when my symptoms of depression worsened tenfold around 11th grade. People asked me what my secret to lose weight was, jokingly saying I probably don’t eat anything. The fact was I didn’t eat. I lost 20 pounds in 3 months. I always slept. I found myself having anxiety attacks more frequently than ever. My social anxiety was full fledged too as I struggled to take the bus - terrified of the concept of being in a closed space with strangers. Instead of taking the bus, I walked 5 miles to school. I didn’t mind the blisters on my feet if it meant that I could avoid public transit. 

 

With college, came confidence and my symptoms lessened some. Just like any single college girl, I started dating around. Ups and downs in dating happen to anyone, right? But towards the end of 2016 I suffered the trauma of sexual assault. I was thrown back into the pit of despair. I had panic attacks on the daily. I became so dissociative I didn’t comprehend when a day would pass or a month. This was rock bottom for me. But even in the midst of hell, I managed to crawl my way out because of my loved ones pushing me towards professional help. The first step towards recovery is acknowledging you need help and next is taking the initiative to do so. It’s far from easy to work your way up to that but I can say this: it’s worth it. Understand that your loved ones are there to support you unconditionally and they merely want the best for you. So please, find the strength within to want the best for yourself too.